Just about a week ago, a Chinese woman in her early 50s living in Shanghai Anfu Road, became famous when a bunch of media reported about her.
She is always wearing a crown with her number 1 haircut and her self-made Lolita dresses, those with the specific type of laces, bows, and panties.
Even matching shoes and handbags are constantly changing every time she shows up, no one has ever seen her in a repeated outfit (the definition of a princess).
Many people have ridiculed her and said she is too old/fat to look cute.
Or that she just wants to catch people’s attention with no bottom line.
Many even go on to assert that she is mental.
But obviously, she is not here to seek your validation.
She doesn’t care if you agree with her fashion sense.
Or if you think she is pretty in her eye-catching Lolita dresses.
Because she has validated herself.
Anfu Road is her stage.
When she enters her turf, she keeps her chin up and walks confidently down the road.
Whether you find her attractive is a subjective opinion, but it’s undeniable that she is magnetic, and that has recruited her loads of fans.
In fact, there is always a group of photographers, who are not even living in the same city, waiting nearby every day hoping to see her by chance and take some photos.
The little princess is not bothered by the photographers and will gently remind them to be careful of cars passing by.
The more photos are posted online, the more curious the netizens are about her.
And soon after, people found out there is a heartwarming story behind what we are seeing today.
This significant icon of Anfu Road had cancer and went through chemotherapy for several years which caused her severe hair loss and weight gaining.
After years of fighting against her serious illness, she looked in the mirror and couldn’t recognize herself anymore.
Instead of pitying herself or having depression, she chose to live the rest of her life to fullness.
She recalled she was in love with Lolita dresses when she was young but never got a chance to wear them.
It was almost impossible to get those Lolita dresses in her current size now, but this time, she chose not to shy away from them, anymore.
She tailor-made all of them with her own hands.
After revealing the full story of the little princess, the reaction of the public has a 180-degree change.
People admire and applaud her, all the negative comments before are gone.
Because they know how much courage she has taken to step out of her comfort zone, and be that version of hers that she has always wanted to be.
The key to self-love, and not giving a fu*k to (your thought about) how people look at you.
A lot of times, even when we think we are practicing self-love, a part of us is still busy seeking love from others.
And the fear of rejection from others, and actually the fear of knowing that we may not be good enough (which my friends, is a lie your primitive brain tells you to protect you), stop us from standing up for ourselves, or pursuing that life that we have wanted to live.
And my friends, this is conditional self-love.
When you love yourself conditionally, you see a world that also only loves you on conditions.
I don’t think you will enjoy living in this place too much. 🙁
Learn to love yourself unconditionally by deciding ahead of time that, no matter what the outcome is, no matter how people see you, you choose to see yourself in the best light possible.
Because what you think about yourself is subjective anyways — why don’t choose something pleasant to think about?
Recently, I asked a man if he wanted to start just seeing just me and no one else (yes I did that), and I knew that regardless of his response, nothing could change my perception that I am an amazing woman who is worthy of love.
And he said no.
I was 5% disappointed, but 95% happy because I stood up for myself (and that I could finally clear out the space for someone I want!).
Self-love is about loving yourself before anyone else; it is about prioritizing your needs so that your cup is full.
When you do that, you become magnetic, and interestingly, this is the time when people who love you for who you are, got attracted to your life.
If life is not in your favor now, know that life is 50/50 and a good or a sh*t day is equally important for your human experience.
Love yourself unconditionally and embrace your life moment to moment, so that you can get the most out of this life.
Hang in there, smile, and don’t lose your pride.